Bring back that lovin' feeling...

Last night the husband and I had a bit of a disagreement. Said disagreement stemmed from some bedroom issues. I often struggle with the line of TMI ( too much info), what to share, what to leave in my head. Those who know me best know that there really isn't such a thing as TMI with me... so I will spill what's already seeping out of my brain.

Let's just say I don't feel sexy. There are times I feel good, even times when I feel attractive. These day's sexy has gone on vacation and I am not sure when she plans her big return. Women are different then men. For a man sex is primitive, and act, not so much something that takes a ton of emotional energy. Having a baby brings a whole new dimension to your womanhood, so does breastfeeding. How on earth do I want my breasts to be touched when half the time a baby is sucking on them and the other half I am hooked up to a milk machine. Dairy Queen anyone?

So that is where we differ. I am trying to find the balance between staying true to me and not being an old shriveled shrew. I am 29, my husband is 30. We are young. I need to put forth more effort and he needs to tap into the female side a bit. I guess it's all about balance. We need to balance better.

I took these pictures of myself. Exhibit A: bathing suit ( which is a while other post) Exhibit B: my clothes on. Exhibit C: Naked. Just Kidding. Obviously I didn't take any naked ( good lord, imagine??? ) But these are the three layers of me. Looking at them I feel good with my clothes on, not fat, not skinny...but just right.
The bathing suit? From the waist up, despite the pouch I am thinking it's not that bad. The Thighs? Didn't realize 138 on a 5'3'' frame looked that bad! ( note to self: step away from the pinot and cheese doodles)
Naked? EEEK! Once again adding another complexity to intimacy. Sometimes I think it's easier being pregnant, at least your belly is firm and you have an excuse to be tired. Plus your va jay jay is yet to be traumatized and morphed into an exit door.

Body image issues. Post Partum oddities. Breast complexities.

No wonder sex is so complicated.

It's a multi faceted issue.

Where to begin???

( Afterthought: I realize I am standing on my toilet taking these pictures, we don't own any full length mirrors so it's the only way I get to see what's really going on past my chest! These photo's have also served as an inspiration to tweeze the caterpillars, err I mean eyebrows that have taken over my face)