I hate to admit this but I was not really looking forward to maternity leave. There, I said it out loud. Don't judge. When Noah was born with some pretty serious and very unexpected issues at birth it rocked my world. The post partum depression and anxiety that followed was some kinda awful. Hot mess does not even describe what I was back in those days. My maternity leave was spent crying, worrying, crying...did I say crying? And then when I went back to work leaving my baby left me crying, worrying and crying some more. Saying it was a tough time does not even cut it.
This time around I have been a new woman. This birth seriously healed some pretty deep wounds. It could not have gone better and taking a healthy newborn home within 24 hours of his birth rocked my world....in a positive way. Too blessed to be stressed was my mantra and I was walking on clouds for days. Of course, reality and sleep deprivation kicked in but it has been wonderful. The weather this time ( November versus May) hasn't hurt either nor the fact that my mother has summers off so I always have an adult around if I need one.
I have grown accustomed to laying around in my PJ's, watching entirely too much t.v, cuddling with my boys and going to the park. How on earth am I going to give this up in a few weeks???
I do look forward to getting dressed in the morning, brushing my hair, tweezing my eyebrows, you know all the things one should do to prevent from becoming a she-beast. I am in some serious need of grooming and only work is going to jump start that! I do like my job and my co-workers are some of my best friends so it's not all bad......I just have to keep telling myself that.
August 9th...please don't come too fast
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